8 months old and on the verge....

Of crawling that is. Well you have been on the verge for almost two months now and still not doing it not that I am worried. What does worry me though is that you love sitting on your bottom and doing this pelvic thrust thing which I believe may lead to bum shufling which I do not want you to do. Your granny was a bum shuffler but not for you missy. You hate staying on your tummy too long but I try to push it with lots of toys put in front of you to play with and sometimes I do resort to a dummy just to stretch you out a bit (mind you does not really work) ha! So maybe by 9 months you might be on the move.

Another thing you are doing is trying to pull up on things especially mummy. It is very clever and shows how strong you are. You desperately want to stand up funny thing.

You are loving your baby led solids and tried many new things this month one that you seemed to like a lot was corn on the cob. You have your faves already though, they are blueberries, cheese, cucumber, carrot, pumpkin, meat and toast. But you don't seem to dislike anything so far which is good. You are very handy with your hands and can pick up a blueberry or pea in your palm and get it in your mouth. Your friend Evie does it with her fingers now so I am guessing you will do that in the next couple of months.

You adore your big brother and love to smile at him in between mouthfuls of boob in the morning while we all sit on the couch. You love most things he does and you smile and giggle. Some things you are not fond of are being pushed over, being poked, being pulled and being rough handles, lucky mummy or daddy are usually around to save you. You get it a bit at playgroup too so I am thinking you may end being a tough one. Who knows.

Mummy is still keen to have a third baby and even though some of your brothers behaviour turns me off I realise neither he nor you nor a third bub would be a 4 year old forever. Daddy has said yes too so I guess the ball really is in mummys court and I will see how I am feeling about it all next year. Dylan has requested another baby but a boy one this time, lol. We will see.

Anyway I am sure you are doing lots of other lovely things but I cannot remember at the moment so will tell you another time.

Love you sweet girl.

7 months and new camera

Happy 7 months baby girl. This last month has seen lots of solids activity with you being on (sort of) three meals a day. I say sort of because some days you don't have 3 meals and some days you do and really what you consume is quite minimal. Apart from your porridge with fruit in morning which you wolf down and you also love bread and baby mum mum rusks. You love orange vegies too and I often give you some steamed or roasted chunks for you to eat. So apart from brekky you are doing baby led weaning for your meals. Which I am loving (apart from the mess) but you have taken to it so well and it saves me pureeing all these meals for you. I just cook you up stuff fresh or you eat what vegies we are having. It helps too that we are now eating mostly organic veg and fruit as we get a box delivered weekly. I usually have to top up with some things and try to get organic but can't always. I am trying to also buy only wholemeal bread and have started getting organic pasta, milk and cheese. Plus free range eggs and chicken.

This month also saw you clapping your hands more well sort of clapping you love to wave your arms around and then they make contact like a clap. Your personality is really coming out too you like to smile at people but they really need to work for it. You are starting to recognise the people we see a lot of like Aunty Anna and Evie and Abi, Granny and Grandma and Papa,and you will give them lovely smiles. Strangers though and people we don't see that often really have to work for their smiles but they usually get them eventually. You have also been sitting and working those core muscles you are really very strong and can sit up for quite a long time. You are a very strong willed girl little Adelita and this is coming out more and more every day, if you want something you really try your very hardest to get it. Your teeth are on the move too you already have your bottomo two and now seem to be getting more with you putting you fingers in your mouth a lot and having some bad nights with sleeping. So more coming I suspect.

Mummy got a new digital SLR camera this month and has been using it quite a bit I have so much to learn but I want to have photography as a hobby and want to use my two favourite people in the world as my subjects. So I have been practicing a lot.

Anyway I will more to say for your eight month look in as you have doing more things in the next month.

Bye darling.

PS Mummy is hopeless with this blog and getting the photos in the right position so they are all at the top, oh well!

6 months old today, time is flying.

6 months old today my little beauty. How did we get her so quickly? Yesterday you were a newborn and today you are a baby that can do stuff.

I am so enraptured by you and your developing personality and your overall development as it seems to be happening oh so fast.

It seems like a few weeks ago you were still not really doing much then all of a sudden you did all of this stuff and are doing more every day. Like sitting, playing with your feet, new sounds you are making, more interaction with us. You like touching our faces and looking around at who you are sitting on it is so cute.

Today on your 6 month birthday you got up on hands and knees so I think crawling is just around the corner for you.

We started you on solids 2 weeks ago and so far you have tried pumpkin (loved), avocado (no thanks), broccoli (yuck), potato (nup), apple (you seem to like this), banana (maybe a bit sweet for you) and carrot (loved). I am just mashing stuff up for you at the moment and you can eat it quite well. But in a few weeks we are going to start baby led solids and so I will be giving you chunks of things to eat and see how you go. We skipped right past the rice cereal and purees and this is suiting you and me. I was going to start you on solids at exactly 6 months but a fortnight ago you were so ready for it so we gave it a go and have not looked back. At the moment you are having a milk feed in the morning and then some fruit about half an hour later and then some pumpkin or something for lunch. Next week we might try some porridge with fruit in it for brekky. Yum.

I had no plans of giving you a dummy Adelita but at 6 weeks I gave you one in the car cos you hated it so much and gradually it worked it's way inside and now you seem to be getting a bit more reliant on it to help you sleep. I would like to wean you off it but don't know when to start of how to start. I guess I could just take it away and have a few bad nights/days with you. I would much rather you use me as your dummy and your comfort. I do feed you to sleep every night and every afternoon nap time but a lot of the time as I am transferring you to your bassinet you tend to start opening your mouth for more boobie and so as I can't stay with you all night I usually pop your dummy in so will have to try and figure out a way of getting you to stop doing that. Ha! I only just weaned Dylan off his dummy at 4 and I don't want to be doing this with you.

Mummy has gone a bit overboard on clothes for you and has been feeling guilty about it. You really don't need as many clothes as I have bought you (actually if we didn't receive any hand me downs it would be just right, but as we did get hand me downs you have a bit too many clothes) so around the house you will be wearing your hand me downs and as we have a few parties and birthdays and events later in the year and earlier next year you will have lots of lovely things to wear to these. And I am going to sell some stuff and donate some too. Makes me feel a little less guilty.

Dylan has been enjoying playing with you Adelita as you are now more and more interactive and it delights him to make you smile and when you do things back. He is also excited for you when you can do something which isd very sweet. He loves his little sister.

I am sure there were many other things I wanted to say to you on this momentous day your half birthday but have forgotten them.

Love you always darling girl.

A beautiful intimate moment

Adelita in her Kozy sling preparing to go to sleep for her morning nap playing with my new teething bling, remembers I am here and gazes up at me and studies me for a bit and then smiles and keeps smiling while looking into my eyes, ah love love love.

I found my friend

I had this friend once. We met in high school. We went to an all girls catholic private school, weird considering we weren't catholic. We met in year 7 her name was Mary. But she left the school at the end of year 8 to go to a public co ed school. We still kept in contact though and I would quite often go to her house for sleepovers. As she is turkish she introduced me to turkish food yum, chocolate laxettes (if we ate too much turkish food), her brother (spunky) and strict parents (but they were always nice to me). I always had fun with her at her house. Although her house was only an average sized suburban brick veneer it seemed like a mansion to me and had things like ducted vacuum, airconditioning, tinted windows, brand new carpet, so I always thought her parents were really rich (they weren't they were just better off than us). One time me and our other friend Penny who I am still friends with went and had a sleepover at Mary's house. We ate lots of food, lots of rich food and watched scary movies, when we decided to go to bed I felt sick so I went and locked myself in the bathroom and threw up all over the bathroom I was mortified and hysterical but her mum came and helped me and helped me clean it up. Mary got into trouble as her parents thought we had raided their liquor cabinet. As if, we were only 13 we were more interested in junk food. I saw my first adult movie at Mary's house, it was her brothers he was about 10 years older than her.

When we were 17 she came out to me and it weirded me out because she was one of the first gay people I knew and I thought she would come on to me, of course she didn't. After I got over the initial shock I realised Mary was still Mary. So we kept hanging out. She moved out of home before me into the inner city (we lived in the burbs) and she got her license and a car before me so we hung out a lot and I would stay at her various places. We would eat and listen to Tori Amos and watch DAAS videos and talk. We had fun. When she came out to her parents they rejected her it was terrible. After a while though she told them she wasn't gay and they 'forgave' her, basically she was living a lie. She tried dating boys it didn't really work.

She was always changing jobs, starting courses and not finishing them and moving. She wanted to be a singer or actor and could sing and act but never really got the break she needed.

When we were in our early 20's we had a falling out. I was going with this great guy Rob, gorgeous blonde Rob who I adored. I was working at Pancake Parlour and living out of home and was at uni doing my degree. I was spending a lot of time with my boyfriend and my pannies friends. This put a lot of strain on my relationship with Mary she was quite possessive of me and would become jealous. She decided to enrol in a course at my uni and the day she went to enrol I asked her to do me a favour which was to drop in a change of subject form for me, (now if anyone hasx ever done one of these they can be a bit of nightmare, the scene from love and other catastrophes is the classic example), she did it but then called me to tell me how stressful it had been and to accuse me of using her and only contacting her when I needed something from her, it hindsight probably true at the time. She basically was telling me to get lost. It was sad but kinda had to happen. I unfortunately took it to the next level and did something pretty awful to her. After this she called me and accused me of this act which I denied. She then basically told me to F off and that was it, I was pretty shaken up but had brought it on myself.

So that was it friendship over.

That was more than 10 years ago, I have thought about her many, many times over these years and have wondered what she was doing and if she was happy. And she appears in my dreams over and over again. I obviously have a guilty conscience about the whole thing.

Her parents shop in the same supermarket as my mum and if I ever went with her I feared running into her or them.

When I joined facebook I tried searching for her to no avail. The other night I found her not on facebook but on a blog so I have read her blog and she is doing alright. She now has a daughter a little younger than Dylan. She has had a husband for 7 years but they are getting a divorce. Her life seems ok. I don't know whether to contact her or not. I need to clear my conscience and apologise or is knowing she is ok enough for me? Food for thought.

I was a terrible friend to her in the end, god I hope I am a better friend to my friends now.

Five months old already.

I cannot believe it the time is going so so fast. Another month gone already.

Things you have been doing this last month are really playing with toys well gripping them and shaking them around. You can hold your head up really well when doing tummy time or being held. You have just discovered raspberries and blow lots and they are messy. You already drool and spew heaps so there is a need for you to wear bibs all the time, lucky I got you some very stylish ones. You love the bath and when I lie you down in it you kick and throw your arms around and smile up at me, I can tell it is one of your favourite places to be, that and in mummy's arms. You may or may not have rolled from back to tummy yesterday I am sure I put you down on your back with a toy in your hand and I turned around to put something in your wardrobe and then you were on your tummy but my memory is sometimes not fabulous so I may have put you on you tummy to begin with, so I am waiting with baited breath to see you do it again. You are still pretty bald too with lots of comments about that, your brother definitely had more hair at your age and your little friend Evie has almost enough for a clip, but the consensus is that even though you are a baldy you are really very very pretty and have gorgeous eyes, many people have said that and I agree my little pretty girl.

We have been spending lots of time with your friend Evie which is lovely now that we live closer to Evie and Abi we can see them so much more and we go to their playgroup now which Dylan loves. Our week is very busy now as Dylan goes to two days of 3 year old kinder, one day of day care, one morning of music and we all go to playgroup so the weekends are a relief. But it is nice to get out and meet new people and see mine and Dylan's friends. We had Dylan's 4th birthday in the last month and it went down really well. Lots of pressies for our spoilt boy. A lovely cubby for Daddy to put up that Dylan and Adelita will both get use out of.

Anyway happy 5 months darling girl next month we will be starting solids, feel a bit sad about that, but that is for another day.

Breastfeeding Adelita

She loves it.
I love it.

We've been doing it from the moment she was born.

My body was made to do this.

I missed this with Dylan. I breastfed him but it was not the same as it is with my girl.

I lost my confidence in the hospital with terribly rough and unsympathetic midwives who forced him on me and told me my nipples were flat.

Second time around I had lovely midwives who let me do it myself and only helped if I asked. They gave me my confidence back by leaving me alone.

I don't remember what he did when he breastfed and what his face looked like or what noises he made and that breaks my heart.

I want to remember my girl and I feeding.

I want to do this forever but will try for two years. I lasted 19 months with Dylan but by then he was only having one feed in the morning.

We used nipple shields, EBM and formula with Dylan.

I have used only EBM with Adelita a couple of times.

Adelita has a breastfeeding face it is different to her everyday face. It is peaceful, relaxed and content.

Her noises range from that sculling noise, to slurping, to murmuring contently.

Oh and she does lots of lovely smiles at me when she pulls off the nipple sometimes leaving me exposed for all the world to see but I don't care. If she isn't smiling at me she studies me, my face.

I was so uptight about feeding Dylan if I did it in public which was rare I covered up. I don't do that anymore I try to be a bit discreet but not too much.

How sad that I was ashamed and embarassed by such a natural and essential thing.

I did still enjoy feeding Dylan despite some issues and I know he enjoyed it too because when I weaned him, he still wanted to keep going, I really should have let him dictate when he stopped but I am not going to beat myself up about it.

I am love love loving this and think Adelita does too.

Love my breastfeeding children.

Four months old.

Well my little beauty you are now four months old and today you discovered you can grab things off mummy or daddy and put them in your mouth or shake them around madly this is a skill you are loving, I can tell from the gleam in your eye when you are doing it and the look of pure concentration tells me it is not random but on purpose. I felt sad for you though when you hit your self in the head with a toy a couple of times and cried with shock that something so fun could also hurt you. Also anything we put near your mouth be it a toy a tissue my nose Dylan's hands you try to put them in your mouth. Daddy and I think you have been trying to say Mama too which gives me a great thrill, for Dada was your big brothers first word. I am loving the flirting you are doing with mummy too, it is happening mostly when you are in my arms after a feed you look at me and I make you smile and then you look away all coy and then look back all serious and I make you smile and it goes on and it is so so cute and special, I love it. I changed the pram over yesterday which made me feel a bit sad that you are growing up so fast so it is now the pusher and the bassinet has been put away not that you went in it much anyway my sling baby. It makes me sad not so much beacuse you are growing up quickly but more so that you may be my last baby and the baby stage is so fleeting. I must admit though I have been buying you clothes in a size 2 because I have many 0's and 1's so I am starting to get some cute things for you to grow into. Anyway that is enough of an update for now. Just wanted you to know that I adore you Adelita. PS I also adore you big brother Dylan.

3 Months old eeeeeeekkkkkkk.

Happy three months to my beautiful girl.. I cannot believe I have a three month old so soon and not a newborn anymore. A proper baby.

Adelita Evangeline you are adored by all of us and I am so in love with you my precious little doll. How I got a daughter I still don't know. I keep expecting someone to show up and claim that she is not mine.

Adelita you are smiling at us and cooing to us which I love. You can push up on your hands and look around you are quite the sitckybeak. You can also roll from front to back and like doing this you have a look of accomplishment on your face after you have rolled. You can look at your toys but are not quite ready to play with them. You love staring at your big brother in adoration following him around the room wherever he goes and he adores you too. He calls you darling and his Alita. You sleep pretty well although have recently discovered catnapping and so do this sometimes much to mummy's chagrin. You have most of your day sleeps in one of your slings which you do complain about getting in but once in you are in heaven. You spend the first part of the night in your bassinet and thn the next part of the night curled up in mummy's arms and attached to my boob. You love your milk and are a super feeder. You had a three month weigh in and now weigh 12 pd 9 which is so good. You are a big un. I think you will be a curvaceous beauty. There is still a debate about your hair colour I think it is dark brown but your daddy thinks it is auburn or stawberry, we will see. Your eyes though are most definitely blue. And you have very pretty long curled eyelashes. You love your flutterbug on your change table and chat and smile at it while getting changed which is cute. You also love to pull off my boob during a feed and flirt with me with those denim eyes or have a chat with me which I love.

I am mad about you my darling daughter and still cannot believe I have you my own little girl.

Photos soon.

If I were.......

Thanks Averil I love these sorts of things:

If I were a month I would be May

If I were a day of the week I would be Sunday

If I were a time of day I would be 7.30am

If I were a planet I would be Earth

If I were a sea animal I would be a mermaid (sorry Averil i did steal this one but i have always found myself drawn to mermaids)

If I were a direction I would be south

If I were a piece of furniture I would be a chaise lounge

If I were a liquid I would be a caramel latte

If I were a gemstone I would be an aquamarine

If I were a tree I would be an apple tree

If I were a tool I would be a spirit level

If I were a flower I would be a lily or tulip

If I were a kind of weather I would be a summer strorm

If I were a musical instrument I would be a singing voice

If I were a colour I would be purple or green

If I were an emotion I would be joy

If I were a fruit I would be an apple

If I were a sound I would be a baby's first coos

If I were an element I would be fire

If I were a car I would be a Mustang Fastback as my husband really desires one of these!

If I were a food I would be smoked salmon

If I were a place I would be a cool green valley

If I were a material I would be jersey cotton

If I were a taste I would be sweet and milky

If I were a scent I would be cool and fresh

If I were an animal I would be a black cat or a chipmunk cos of my cheeks

If I were an object I would be a DVD

If I were a body part I would be a mouth

If I were a facial expression I would be a toothy grin

If I were a pair of shoes I would be a pair of high heeled black and white t-bar mary janes.

One month old today.

Adelita is one month old today can you believe it! Please don't let the time go this fast every month.

Even though it has already been a month I am still in pain from the birth waaaaa. DH asked for some bedroom action about a week ago and I said "I am still bleeding, am still sore, have haemorrhoids and leaky huge boobs, still interested" he he he. Poor DH. He is very patient. I told him I would let him know how I felt after my 6 week post natal appointment, also see what the doctor says. My SPD has also flared up again after a very long walk last thursday to pick DS up from Kinder and then a couple of long shopping trips. I thought it had gone and would be gone by now. Anyway it is easier to manage without a big belly. Poor me. Nah I have this beautiful litt le girl to show for all the pain.

As for my little girl we had her 4 week check yesterday and she has gained 275grams and is now 4890grams or 10pd7 and 57cm long. So she is big but not the hugest weight gain in the world. The MCHN said most people expect babies born big to have huge weight gains but this is often not the case. Anyway she is beautiful and divine and I am in love with her little squishy nose and pushed in chin and roly poly thighs and sighs and grunts and her sofness. I did buy her some girly clothes and she has recieved some very girly clothes so is being dressed in a mixture of Dylan's old things and her new things. Oh how I love girl things. I have finished her nursery not that she is sleeping in it yet but it is all gorgeous and girly, but not too girly! When hubby has put up the blinds in there I will take a photo and post it.

Adelita loves sleeping in here ERGO sling that I got the infant insert for, I was going to use my Baba Sling for the first few months and then the ERGO but after using the baba a couple of times with her in it I realised it wasn't quite the right sling for our purposes plus she loves being upright and in the baba they lie down. So into the ergo she goes a couple of times a day and she falls asleep almost straight away. Our nights are going well too I wake as soon as she gets restless and starts grunting so she doesn't get a chance to cry, I have her all wrapped in a kiddopotamus wrap or a grobag wrap and I feed her still wrapped with no light on and I don't change her so she goes straight back to sleep, it is great why didn't I know how to do this with Dylan. I dread the day she leaves our room and into her cot and own room, have been thinking though maybe when that happens I might get hubby to take one side off the cot and do a sidecar type of thing with her so she is still in with me. Although our bedroom is quite small but it might work. She dislikes being away from me and being laid down in the pram the rocker etc. No smiles as yet but we are getting eye contact and some little noises, oh so cute.

Dylan is still struggling with the night time and going to sleep by himself and staying asleep by himself so he is needing hubby in with him to help him go to sleep and sometimes hubby goes in to help him go back to sleep or he comes into our bed. He had a lot change in the space of a small amount of time so I guess he is still getting used to it all. He calls our new place "new house" and our old place "home" so if you say "we are going home" you get told off and have to call it by the correct name, LOL.

Life as a mum of two is busy and hard but we are getting there.

Two weeks old already and thoughts of more babies!

During my pregnancy and immediately after Adelita's birth I told DH adamantly that I was done at two babies. The pregnancy was very hard due to the SPD which got worse as time went on and I also had terrible fluid retention and high blood pressure. The birth was also very hard not as hard as some people have it but hard enough for me and harder than Dylan's birth. All of this has turned me off my ideal of having three kids and so I have told DH I am done. He actually has witnesses to this too, my midwife Louise heard me saying it to him after the birth. He he. He wishes he had got it on video.

BUT....

Look at what my DH and I created!!!!!!!

How can I stop?

I told my darling friend A that I was having second thoughts about stopping at two and she has reminded me that the lovely newborn phase which is what Adelita is in only lasts about 4 weeks and if that was the reason for having more then it was a bit silly. And she is quite right. I am in love with the lovely gorgeous soft newborn stage Adelita is in and I know it will not last and if I had another baby their newborn phase would only last a short time too. I can uunderstand why Michelle Dugger keeps going back for more!!

BUT.........

Look what else my DH and I created!!!!!!!!!!!!

Surely I could make just one more of these?

Will give it a few years and see if I feel the same in a while. And of course if DH will be in agreeance.

The birth of Adelita Evangeline 7th of March, 2010.

Well as the title suggests my baby is finally here. She was born on Sunday the 7th of March this year at 10.58pm after a 15 hour drug free labour. She was born 3 days after her due date. And oh my goodness she is a she. She is beautiful and gorgeous and soft and lovely and I am absolutely besotted with her.

I had no inkling that Sunday was going to be her B day. I had had no show. I had been experiencing Braxton Hicks but these had been very infrequent, painless and I had been having them for weeks. I had had no pre labour anything so I really thought I was going to be having another very late baby as DS was 10 days late. I had had a midwife appointment on the Wednesday and I was measuring a week ahead as I had been for many weeks and baby was still on the brim and only 4/5 engaged. The midwife I had at that appointment Tammy had told me that she was working Friday night or Sunday morning and those were good times to give birth as she would be there, turns out I had her on the Sunday morning for a few hours. At the appointment she booked me in for a 41 week appointment the following wednesday and also for a Monday appointment when I would be 41w4d and that appointment would be for an ultrasound to check the fluid around bub, a CTG monitoring session and a stretch and sweep. I had hoped to avoid this especially the S&S. I was also advised that if nothing by 42 weeks I would be induced and would not be able to give birth in the birth centre. So going into labour naturally was a relief.

On the previous Monday we had moved into our new house. I did not do any of the moving but I did do some packing and some unpacking, probably too much. I had suddenly got my nesting bug and wanted to go with it. I had not been able to nest in the old place as we were packing it up and also there was no space for baby there anyway so I was doing it at the new place. I started with the kitchen, then DS' room, then our room and then finally the best bit the baby's room, aaaaah it was all set up and ready for our baby. The last thing that was done for it was DH setting up my beautiful new seed pod for our new baby to sleep in, he did this on the Friday in the nick of time. So I really think all of this packing, unpacking and nesting was helping bring this baby out into the world. I did none of the natural induction techniques that I used with Dylan it just happened. I had actually started using evening primrose oil at 38 weeks when we got the settlement date for our new place so I stopped using the EPO as I wanted to move in before baby arrived.

On the Sunday morning I awoke early, well earlier than normal with the urge to go to the toilet and I was in quite a bit of pain. So I got up and went to the toilet and then went again and then again. I suddenly thought this is how labour started with Dylan. Then I got worried about the possibility of being about to go into labour and the house being a bit untidy for my mother in law (who had to come over to mind Dylan) so I set about tidying up. At 8am pretty much on the dot I had my first contraction and I thought was that a contraction or another toilet pain? 10 minutes later I had another pain the same and I remembered what the midwife had said about bub being pretty much posterior and not to slouch about on the couch but to bend forward to get bubs into a better position so I leaned forward over the bench through that contraction. Then I thought I had better go and tell DH that I was possibly in labour but that he should sleep for a little while longer. In the meantime DS had gotten up and so I made him breakfast and had a little myself. I finished all of my tidying and then went to tell DH that yes it was labour and the contractions were 10 minutes apart. I was using the bench to lean over and was rocking my hips a bit to help with the pain which was not too bad at this stage. Hubby got up and I went and had a shower. I asked him to call his mum and sort out what we were doing with DS. They decided that it would be better if we dropped him at their house to stay. So we quickly packed up a bag of stuff for him and then I called the birth centre.

It was now after 9am and the contractions were 5 minutes apart and were lasting 60-90 seconds. I called the birth centre I talked to Donna and told her I was in labour, she asked me a bunch of questions and heard me experience a contraction and told me to breathe through it, and then asked me what I would like to do and I said "Ah come in to hospital!" and so off we went. I think at this stage I thought it was going to be a quick labour and was excited it would be over soon, my labour with DS had been 21.5 hours which is quite long! We realised we had no petrol so stopped for petrol and just like when I was in the car in labour with DS I was totally paranoid that every other driver would know that I was in labour, in fact while DH was paying for the petrol him and the attendant both looked at the car at the same time and laughed and I was convinced the petrol station attendant knew I was in labour and DH was telling him I was. In reality they were talking about the terrible storms that Melbourne had experienced the day before, LOL, what a kook I am! We dropped DS at his grandparents and MIL ran out to the car to get stuff and later on told me she couldn't look at me. But she did provide me with a plastic bag and a towel as I had told DH I felt really nauseous. I couldn't get out of the car so DS had to say goodbye to me while I was still in the car. As he went inside I had a few tears that ours and his life was about to dramatically change. DH took only a couple of minutes to settle DS and then we were off again. I was timing the contractions using the stopwatch on my mobile and writing the times and duration down on a notepad. The contractions were ranging from between 5 and 3 minutes between them and between 90 -110 seconds by this stage. I was using distraction techniques and breathing to get through them.

We finally arrived at the hospital about 11.30 and had to go up to level 5 to the birth centre, in the lift there were people discussing which floor they had to go to and it was decided it was floor 5 to visit a new baby. I told them I was going to floor 5 too to have a new baby. They asked if I was ok/scared/etc and I told I had done it all before. We made it to the birth centre and Donna met us at the door and took us straight to a lovely homely room and told us to settle in and that she would be back shortly. She came back and told us she had to monitor me to see what was happening with me and with bub and she asked lots of questions. DH in the meantime went down and moved the car and got my bags. During the monitoring process it was discovered that I had high blood pressure I think it was 150 over 100 which is quite high. I had had high blood pressure at various points during the pregnancy but never the other symptoms for pre eclampsia. So due to my high BP I then had to be strapped up to a monitor and had to have a blood test and had to do a urine sample which I could not do (and I tried for hours!). When they finally got urine out of me (via a catheter) it did show protein in there so I was stuck with three things attached to me.

I found standing either on the floor in the room and rocking, or in the shower and either banging on the walls (yes I did read Birth Skills by Juju Sundin) or just feeling the cool tiles on my feet and hands and face really helped during the contractions so I kept doing this for the first few hours. Also just either swaying, rotating my hips or rocking really helped. Donna had handed over to Tammy which was ace because I had had her for 5 of my midwife appointments. She basically sat outside the shower on fit ball doing paperwork and keeping an eye on the monitor and once in a while would ask me if I was ok. She sort of left me to do my thing in there. Oh and by the way when I say I was in the shower I was just using it as a room I did not have the water on. Sadly I only had Tammy for a few hours before she had to go home and she handed over to George.

George kind of annoyed me because as soon as he came in he asked me to come out of the shower and into the room. I think he thought I was just in there using the toilet and did not realise I was actually using the room as a zone. So he would ask me to come out and I would and then I would wander back this happened a few times during his 'shift". George would help me to breathe by breathing with me and telling me to slow down my breathing that kind of annoyed me too. After a few hours George told me that the policy of the hospital was to do an internal after you had been there 5 hours so it must had been about 4.30pm by this stage or around about that time. I very reluctantly agreed and had to relinquish my standing position and lie flat on the bed. It was excruciating and I was only 4 or 5 centimetres, sigh, so much for my quick labour! I had to endure a few more internals throughout and they just got worse and worse.

Now you are all probably wondering what DH was doing through all of this. He was reading the paper, doing the crossword, sitting still and quiet. Doing everything the midwives asked of him, giving me sips of water, and so on. He remembers what I was like during DS' labour and wanted to stay out of my way. Basically he knew I wanted to do my own thing and not be disturbed. It was important for him to be there but to not be a very active member of the labour experience. A few times during the labour I would smile at him or talk to him but basically I was in a zone and there I stayed. We think the midwives thought it was odd that he wasn't a very active birth partner but that is the way I wanted it.

George kept at me to do a wee as they needed to check for protein (which I did have) and I tried and I tried and I tell you it was so painful getting down on that toilet and everything would just close up and i could never do it. He got one out of my finally with a catheter as he thought that by having a full bladder the head was not descending. Sadly that made no difference. The 8 or so hours I had George are kind of a blur about when things happened. I know he did at least two more excruciating internals and didn't think the progression of my labour was fast enough as it kind of seemed to be stopping and starting. For a couple of hours I would get the uncontrollable urge to push but it would only be about one in every four contractions. George would sometimes tell me to go with it and sometimes ask that I breathe through them. He tried me in all sorts of positions to get things moving like leaning over a birth ball on the bed, standing, lying propped up on a beanbag, on a birthing stool and on my left side where he would lift my right leg and get me to push. During my second internal he found I was 8-9cm dilated and during the next one I was 9 but half the cervix lip was still there. He tried to move it OMG owwwwwww but it wouldn't budge. He then decided to get a doctor in to check and see whether they thought I needed Oxytocin to speed things up. At this point I had had enough and had a cry and asked him if that would mean I would have to move out of the birth centre and into the labour ward and if the answer was yes could I have drugs or was it too late! He asked me what drugs I wanted and that it was not too late. "EPIDURAL!!!!!!" was my reply. Sadly it seemed my intervention free, natural, drug free, lovely birth was becoming out of reach for me. But at that point I was over it and the contractions were just so bad (a lot in my back due to her position) that I didn't care I just wanted the pain gone. When the doctor came and did yet another excruciating internal she decided that all was ok and I could keep going the way I was going and would not need the Oxytocin, yay but not yay as no Epidural but drug free birth which I appreciate now. The doctor actually managed to move the cervix lip and broke my waters and I was nearly there. They also discovered bub had not moved into the ideal position of left but was still on my right side. Getting me leaning forward was supposed to help this.

As darkness approached we had another handover of staff and my new midwife was the amazing Louise, who was the midwife I saw for my very first appointment, she was motherly, more experienced and just lovely! I am so grateful I had her for the last stage of this birth experience. She got the details of everything from George and set about making me comfortable and DH comfy (actually offered him a coffee 10 hours after we got there, poor fella didn't eat for over 30 hours!), and set about getting my baby out. I think her shift started about 9pm ish! Louise set me up on the bed with a bean bag and many pillows including my own from home behind me which was ace because I was very tired by this stage, I think I had been in active labour for 12 hours or so. So I lay there while she prepared things and talked to DH and the whole involuntary pushing thing started again and was happening more often which was good. She offered me the gas which had not really been done earlier and I decided to give it a go (I did use it for Dylan and it helped) but after trying it through 2 contractions I was so violently ill that I had to have a shot of Maxalon. After about an hour of this she suggested I get on the toilet for a wee. I politely said "Thanks but no thanks" as I thought it would hurt too much. But Louise was insistent and got me off the bed and onto the toilet with DH's help. Aaaaahhhh that actually felt good and after my wee the baby's head started finally coming down and then my involuntary pushing suddenly got very intense and my contractions seemed to stop and I could feel the beginning of her head crowning, finally something was happening. Louise knew she had to get me off the toilet but I was refusing. She called another midwife and DH in to help get me off and standing over a mat. A few more pushes and Louise was telling me where the baby's head was at, "I can see the forehead, I can see the eyebrows, I can see the eyes, I can see the nose." When I got to the chin it also all goes a bit blurry, the two midwives got me down on all fours which I was also reluctant to do. Then I think when they could see bubs chin or the top of the chin that is when they realised there was a problem and Louise pushed the EMERGENCY button. At this point 3 more midwives and two doctors rushed in within seconds and they got me on my back on the floor, and the doctors got her out very dramatically, very painfully, but suddenly I felt a sucking and a pulling and baby was out and on me. Very warm, very wet and crying looking at me. I lifted bubs up and saw that she was a girl and said "Oh my god its a girl, a girl!"

Basically she had Shoulder Dystocia and was stuck by her right shoulder. Louise knew by the fact that the chin was not coming out that she needed help getting out. Had they realised earlier before she had started descending through the birth canal I may have ended up having a C-section. I think it was severe shoulder dystocia because the doctor later said her shoulder was stuck behind my pelvis. Anyway they got her out and I was elated. DH started taking photos and the room started clearing out, the staff were all saying "Congratulations" to us which was lovely. I had specifically asked for immediate skin to skin contact which I did not have with DS so Louise pulled back my nightie and got her onto my skin. Aaaahhhh. All I could do was stare at her and tell DH "That is it, this is the last one!!!!" LOL. Louise told me I looked so much better and so relieved and happy. That I was. She was out it was over. Niether of us wanted to cut the cord so Louise did it. I had an assisted third stage with the injection in the thigh and Louise pushing on my womb, I think she decided it was taking too long so assisted my placenta out herself.

Louise had a good look at my bits and decided I probably needed stitches and was not 100% comfortable doing them herself so called in a doctor to have a look. I had two doctors give their opinions on the 'area' and it was concluded that I did need stitches. The handsome young male doctor did the sutures and it took ages. Luckily I had local anaesthetic but it still was very tender. In the doctors words "It's just like a patchwork quilt" eeeekkkk I hate to imagine what it looks like down there. I had to have my legs in stirrups and of course had been helped up onto the bed by this stage as I had birthed her on the floor. While I was being stitched up DH had a lovely long hold of darling Adelita and she just couldn't keep her eyes off him, and he could not keep his eyes off her. He actually teared up which is so beautiful and one of the things I adore about my DH.

I found the whole experience very difficult and hard especially trying to have an active labour while being hooked up to 3 monitors. The worst one was the heart monitor for me which was attached to my finger it was just so distracting. I would get into a zone and then would lose it as the cords would stop me from doing whatever it was that was helping. I didn't get to have my water birth which is sad but oh well can't be helped, even if I had asked for one I wouldn't have been able to due to the monitoring and actually it would not have helped her come out so probably for the best that I didn't get in the bath. I also didn't use my heat pack nor my stress balls a la Juju Sundin they never came out of the bag.

After being stitched up Adelita was passed back to me and Louise helped her attach and we had our first feed together which was so nice she fed for so long. During this I got to eat which was heaven and DH had made me a lovely cup of milky sugary tea, bliss. As he had not eaten for so long and had to drive home anyway and as it was so late we decided DH should go home before I was taken to my room so I spent some time staring at my baby girl and bonding with her. Then Louise got all of my bathroom stuff out of my bag along with my jammies and helped me off the bed to have a shower and use the toilet but when I got into the bathroom I got a wave of dizziness and my hearing went (as I had lost quite a lot of blood) so Louise helped me back to the bed and gave me a bed bath, and I cleaned my teeth and got into my PJs. Then it was off to the ward for us (me in a wheelchair, Adelita in a little cot all wrapped up and in a tiny hospital gown) there she was weighed and measured and given her Hep B and Vitamin K shots. The midwives were all guessing how big she was and kept saying "She's a big one." I knew she was big, or that she was going to be big I could tell by how big I was and by how much pain I was in during the last few weeks. They were guessing 4.5, 4.6, he he. She was actually 4365grams (9 pound 6) and 53.5cm long, whoa how did I produce something that big and birth her naturally. DS was 3.9kg and 51.5cm long and was 7 days later than Adelita. And DH and I are not the largest people in the world. But both sides of the family just seem to produce big babies. None under 8 pound. Anyway I said goodbye to Louise and she gave me a kiss and a cuddle and we were settled into our room and I attempted to sleep, and couldn't.

We stayed in hospital for three nights as she and I had temps and she was also a bit jaundiced but that is all fine now. As we were public I was sharing with three other women and coincidentally the woman next to me is married to a guy I used to work with and she had a little boy the same day I had Adelita so we have exchanged numbers and will hopefully stay in touch.

Adelita is now just over a week old and thriving. She is 120 grams above her birth weight and loves her boobie. We have had no feeding issues so far apart from a couple of grazes on my nipples the first few days but they are all cleared up now. She is a great sleeper so far too but it is still early days things could change.

We are all in love with our little Adelita and I still can't believe I have a baby girl. She is so beautiful!

Almost there!

39 weeks on Thursday and I am feeling every pound of this big boofa baby.

I have SPD, cankles, feeling hot all the time and having trouble sleeping, waaaaa. Well all good practice for when this little one decides to make his or her appearance in this world. I must admit I am looking forward to interrupted sleep from a newborn as opposed to interrupted sleep from pains in the night.

On top of being almost 39 weeks and all of my physical issues (it is my body's way of telling me I am getting too old for this) we are moving into a new place in the next week. It was pruchased on the 23rd of December and settlement was supposed to be on the 5th of Feb which gave me a month to unpack and nest. Unfortunately the dude that built the unit did not do everything properly when subdivising leavinbg us with a settlement date of tomorrow, eeeeeekkkkkkk. Oh well the move still must go on. My husband is doing most of it but I have been helping. I just can't wait to get in there and start nesting. Oh and did I mention it is brand new with air con and an ensuite and a lovely big kitchen and myown laundry and 3 bedrooms and a backyard albeit small but our own backyard nonetheless.

Let me give you a visual of what we currently live in:
Two bedroom upstairs flat
Old unrenovated
Dirty falling apart
Shag carpet was once white now greyish
Kitchen the size of a small bathroom
Bathroom the size of a broom cupboard
Shared backyard which is ok as Dylan has a friend downstairs
Shared laundry downstairs

I must admit though I have loved living here it has been a real era of my life as I have lived in this flat for 13 years. I moved in here at 22 by myself with nothing not even a fridge I had a bed a couch and my teenage bedroom furniture. I then acquired a roomy the lovely Anna (who is still my dear friend) and a table and a fridge. Then I acquired Mark when Anna moved out and that was cool asd he is a sweetheart and gay. Then I got Loren who was here for 18 months and she was cool too. Then the psycho Kristy but I will save that story for another day she stayed 3 months and then I kicked her out. Then Seona moved in, she had always wanted to live in this flat ever since she saw it and then finally she was able to, she is a friend from the street I grew up in. Then sadly for Seona she introduced me to the husband and so then he moved in and she moved out. And he has been here for 8 years, poor him.

So many things have happened in this flat. I finished my degree here. We conceived three children here (one in our hearts, one STILL in utero). Many life changing decisions have been made here. A few parties. Friendships made and broken. Hearts broken (mine). Lots of fun. Lots of music and movies. Lots of playing (with Dylan). Just lots. It is sad to leave but as there is no room left at the inn we must move.

So off we go to the BURBS!

Come on baby almost ready now.

32 weeks and hotter than hot....not hawt though!

It is far too hot for my liking. 35 yesterday 34 today 33 tomorrow 41 monday and so on I hate Melbourne summer, especially while pregnant. Eeeekkk waaaaa and sheesh.

I am now 32 weeks and feeling every inch the heifer that I have become. I am waddling mostly due to the SPD I have, sweating especially on my upper lip (noice), grumpy, have huge mammaries and so on. This second journey through pregnancy has turned me off another one pretty thoroughly. I don't feel glowy or maternal just hot and fat. Oh well.

Baby is quite active and was head down at last midwife appointment hope it stays that way and gets out early although as Dylan was born at 41w3d I do not have high hopes for an early eviction.

I am finishing work in two weeks on the 25th of Jan yay so that is something to look forward to and then we are moving so I will be packing labelling sorting and culling. My mum bought a brand new unit and we are going to live in it and pay her a little rent ha. Yay for us. Eventually we will buy our own place but we cannot afford it right now. Although the unit is way out of town it is brand new and has 3 bedrooms 2 bathrooms 2 living areas laundry air conditioner a pretty fabbo kitchen a garage and a small yard for Dylan, a step up from our very old upstairs run down falling apart hot stinky 2 bedroom 1 bathroom 1 living area shared downstairs laundry shared backyard no garage or carport yucky flat. Hooray. Jimmie is not 100% happy with the location but he is willing to give it a go and the promise of a new car and an uncluttered home has made him a bit more happy and excited. I think I will be happier there too. I will be closer to mum and two of my close girlfriends who both have a daughter close to Dylan's age and one of whom has just had a new bub and one who is due to have new bub 12 weeks after me so we will all be on mat lave together yay. So I am hoping to be able to see both of them more often.

I have been preparing a little for bub's arrival with packing the baby bag and starting my hospital bag. My mum bought us a bassinet and I have booked a capsule. Can't really do a lot else for bubs until we move. I do want to start preparing myself for birth though, I am going to reread Birth Skills and am supposed to practice my deep breathing and relaxation. I am hoping to have a water birth but will just go with the flow on the day and so whatever I feel like doing at the time. As I am having a birth centre birth there are no decisions to be made re pain relief as there is none, I will use the gas if need be and try to be active but hoping that if I get in the bath that will help. Knowing my luck there will be someone else using it when I want to.

Apart from that I am too hot to do anything today so will probably hang on the couch and do not much else. Hoping Jimmie will want to play with Dylan and I can relax how lazy.